Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Dear Mom
Ok, so if I had the nerve here is what I would send.
Dear Mom, since you and sis like to talk about me all the time, allow me to do the same. I tried to tell you that she is a liar and a sneak and you didn't want to hear it. You go ahead and believe what you want. I know the truth and I have known it for years and it has nothing to do with anything my dh might or might not say. It started when she was very young, pre-memory even, with her being very jealous of me. Always was and no doubt always will be. Deep seated emotions like that lead to lying, sneaking, and tryng to always out do the *better* one. Of course you don't want to believe any of this is possible. Let me provide a few examples. Remember the night Gram accused her and E of having sex on the couch right in front of her? Of course, no one wanted to believe her, well she was a drunk so what did she know? Well I always believed her, they were definitely doing something they should not have been doing on her couch, maybe not intercourse but sex is more than just intercourse. M had no respect for her. That was always obvious. Neither did my younger brothers. So yes she would do something like that. But the clincher, and YOU said this to ME, that SHE had said to YOU, how could I be having sex on the couch when I'm a VIRGIN! Well that was not true, she told me she lost hers in 1982. So was she lying to me then, or to you? And if you deny that she said it, let me assure you, my memory is not faulty on this at ALL. I'm sure she would deny saying it now. In fact we have discussed this before and she had obviously given you some explanation to cover it all over. Believe what you like, I know better.
Did you know she spent a lot of time stalking a manager at her pizza hut? This was before E of course. Did you hear her when she told me, at Gram's dining room table while everyone was sitting and eating, that she had deliberately starved the gerbil I had given her to death? I read in your journal that you lent me the part where you said I was addicted to drugs. Funny, I suppose that info came from her? Cuz she is after all THE font of ALL knowledge. Well as I recall I wasn't doing any kind of drugs at the time. When she lived with us I did smoke a *little* pot in the evenings. Kind of like a person having a drink after dinner. Well I am sure she gleefully shared that with her because that made me the *bad* one.
Is it possible that some people like to keep things private, and not even share things with their own mother? But since you are no doubt wondering, no I am not doing any drugs currently. No, I don't share everything with you. In fact, there is quite a lot you don't know about me. Things that I choose to keep private and not share with others for reasons of my own. But of course M loves to run her mouth and tell people things that are none of her business. I have known for years that she told you about the eating disorder I once HAD. Do you and she think I still have it? I am incensed to know that you and she have gabbled about this over the years. The only reason she even knows is because she was living in the same house when I started it. So you must think I am still doing it. Otherwise why would I choose to keep it a *secret* all these years?? Well maybe because its my own fucking business and nobody else's! I'll set the record straight right now. I did have the disorder for 4 years. But I stopped it ON MY OWN in 1985!!!! Before I got married!!! K knew about it and it was because of his love and support that I was able to stop and NEVER had a relapse. This was a private thing and I CHOSE not to share about it with you or anyone else. I still don't want to discuss it with you. I am furious. I was furious when I first figured out that she had told you about it many years ago. She has a big fucking mouth. She has no tact. And she is a sneaky liar. Go ahead and believe everything she says if you want to, which obviously you do. Get as cozy with her as you like. But from here on out don't expect to have a close relationship with me. I don't need that kind of bull shit in my life.
Dear Mom, since you and sis like to talk about me all the time, allow me to do the same. I tried to tell you that she is a liar and a sneak and you didn't want to hear it. You go ahead and believe what you want. I know the truth and I have known it for years and it has nothing to do with anything my dh might or might not say. It started when she was very young, pre-memory even, with her being very jealous of me. Always was and no doubt always will be. Deep seated emotions like that lead to lying, sneaking, and tryng to always out do the *better* one. Of course you don't want to believe any of this is possible. Let me provide a few examples. Remember the night Gram accused her and E of having sex on the couch right in front of her? Of course, no one wanted to believe her, well she was a drunk so what did she know? Well I always believed her, they were definitely doing something they should not have been doing on her couch, maybe not intercourse but sex is more than just intercourse. M had no respect for her. That was always obvious. Neither did my younger brothers. So yes she would do something like that. But the clincher, and YOU said this to ME, that SHE had said to YOU, how could I be having sex on the couch when I'm a VIRGIN! Well that was not true, she told me she lost hers in 1982. So was she lying to me then, or to you? And if you deny that she said it, let me assure you, my memory is not faulty on this at ALL. I'm sure she would deny saying it now. In fact we have discussed this before and she had obviously given you some explanation to cover it all over. Believe what you like, I know better.
Did you know she spent a lot of time stalking a manager at her pizza hut? This was before E of course. Did you hear her when she told me, at Gram's dining room table while everyone was sitting and eating, that she had deliberately starved the gerbil I had given her to death? I read in your journal that you lent me the part where you said I was addicted to drugs. Funny, I suppose that info came from her? Cuz she is after all THE font of ALL knowledge. Well as I recall I wasn't doing any kind of drugs at the time. When she lived with us I did smoke a *little* pot in the evenings. Kind of like a person having a drink after dinner. Well I am sure she gleefully shared that with her because that made me the *bad* one.
Is it possible that some people like to keep things private, and not even share things with their own mother? But since you are no doubt wondering, no I am not doing any drugs currently. No, I don't share everything with you. In fact, there is quite a lot you don't know about me. Things that I choose to keep private and not share with others for reasons of my own. But of course M loves to run her mouth and tell people things that are none of her business. I have known for years that she told you about the eating disorder I once HAD. Do you and she think I still have it? I am incensed to know that you and she have gabbled about this over the years. The only reason she even knows is because she was living in the same house when I started it. So you must think I am still doing it. Otherwise why would I choose to keep it a *secret* all these years?? Well maybe because its my own fucking business and nobody else's! I'll set the record straight right now. I did have the disorder for 4 years. But I stopped it ON MY OWN in 1985!!!! Before I got married!!! K knew about it and it was because of his love and support that I was able to stop and NEVER had a relapse. This was a private thing and I CHOSE not to share about it with you or anyone else. I still don't want to discuss it with you. I am furious. I was furious when I first figured out that she had told you about it many years ago. She has a big fucking mouth. She has no tact. And she is a sneaky liar. Go ahead and believe everything she says if you want to, which obviously you do. Get as cozy with her as you like. But from here on out don't expect to have a close relationship with me. I don't need that kind of bull shit in my life.
# posted by Anne @ 5:11 PM 
