Family of 6 in PA

Ok so its MD and I called my mother. We had a nice conversation until we started talking about my kids. She became very forceful in her tone and wording regarding getting my boys' behavior issues under control. And when I mentioned that I was looking forward to J being home again in 2 weeks she commented on how awful it will be because he'll be back to all his misbehaving. I explained he is plenty wild when he's home so we aren't missing anything (not in those words). And I said how I was so looking forward to him not going to school next year and she was very negative about that too....oh, you have to work with him over the summer and see if he will do his work! Which is just repeating what I have said to her but still....she has always been a proponent of the school at home stuff which doesn't work for us, and so I really hesitate to tell her that I am going to try something completely different once he is home. Yes the 3 R's are important and they can be learned in fun ways not just by following lessons. So can everything else. I won't label it unschooling (especially not to her!) but that is what I am researching now to see how, or in what way, it can work for our family. That doesn't mean we will be unschoolers, by some definitions, but hey I am looking into it. And I also mentioned that J went to church with me, I had told him I wanted him to check it out and see if he wanted to go there for CCD next year (which would require him to go to Mass with me every 2 weeks) or go to the church up here for CCD (daddy takes him and he doesn't have to go to Mass). She said, oh, I have to make that decision and tell him! I calmly replied no, I want that to be his choice. I hope that he will go to CCD, he can decide where, and she did back down on that. but jeez. This reminds me of the long period of time that she would be on me constantly about weaning J. I finally had to tell her its my kid and I'll nurse him as long as I want to! She kept hard on it for over a year. I'm sure a lot of people have trouble disagreeing with their mothers. I decided after the phone call that, though I think she has made some unwise choices with regard to moving to MD, perhaps it is, after all, best that she did not move here to PA. I don't want her to restrict our home schooling freedom or choices. The trouble is I have to watch my mouth and not say too much to her about it!